Entry #175
Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Michael Sanchez recently sent me a link to his latest musical endeavor, the aptly titled The Way It Is and, honestly, I have to say that it’s probably the best stuff he’s ever done. His songwriting has come a long way from when he was fronting The New Death Show at Delaware’s Barn Door and I still think he has one of the best, most underrated set of vocal cords out there. He even pulled off an acoustic reinvention of Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” which, I admit, sounds like a really bad idea until you hear the finished result. The guy’s also a talented filmmaker - although I may be a bit biased since I had a cameo in that bowling movie he made in the late 90’s. Actually, if anyone has a copy of that film, I’d love to see it. He also once gave me a really good haircut, (although it did take a few hours.) And I was almost mugged once while riding a bus with him through DE’s Southbridge projects. Anyway, it’s always good to see old friends moving on to better things. You can pick up both his EP’s here.

Speaking of haircuts, Hairless Vampire Beast Found in Texas! And, no, I don’t mean George Bush Sr.

Entry #174
Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Part one of No Direction Home was excellent last night. I think it’s the first time I’ve seen Bob Dylan interviewed, actually. Very insightful. It’s also the only Scorsese movie I’ve seen where no one got shot. Except for maybe Raging Bull. Did anyone get shot in Raging Bull?

I saw Bob Dylan once at the Mann Music Center back in ‘98 and I couldn’t understand a word the man sang. Actually, I almost got into a fight with four guys at that show as well - I think I’m starting to detect a pattern here.

Cliff Burton died tragically in a freak bus accident 19 years ago today. And speaking of bass players, The Sitch still needs one. Spread the word and tell your friends. We’d really like to start playing shows again.

Entry #173
Monday, September 26, 2005

Question of the Day: So, the obnoxious drunk man sitting behind you (who has been harassing the crowd for the first hour of Paul McCartney’s sold out concert) collapses on top of your girlfriend’s 16 year old sister during “Penny Lane”. Do you:

A. Follow your gut and pummel the guy into the ground, taking off before security comes, hoping that you can find their car in the lot before they leave?

or B. Stand back, play it cool and risk looking like a puss in front of her old man.

You’re never asked these types of questions on the SAT’s, bro. Good times. Good times.

Anyway, I have to admit that old Macca hasn’t lost his touch. His voice sounded as sweet as ever, even in the echoing cavern that is the Wachovia center. And the set list was amazing. And the drunk man? Well, after pulling him off, he then left to get security, claiming that we stole $60 off him. It took a while for him to return however, since he was too drunk to remember where he was sitting. In the end, he got the police escort out of the building , missing a killer version of “Helter Skelter” Did I mention I’m a pacifist?

K-Os killed it on Saturday as well - dropping many freestyle verses for the much too thin crowd. Hopefully he’ll be back in the studio working on album three shortly.

Entry #172
Friday, September 23, 2005

I always love it when people send me emails with a subject line that reads “Please Don’t Post This”. That’s like pissng gasoline on an open flame, my friend.

Anyway, once again, Chuck D. and Public Enemy come through with the voice of reason. Click here to download Mista Chuck’s latest commentary on our government’s poor response to the crisis in the Gulf. It’s time to shut ‘em down, bro.

And speaking of Public Enemy, this week’s Mighty Top 5 comes from the only man I know who can recite the entire “Fear of a Black Planet” album word for word, the king of Playstation and the madman of dodgeball, Mr. Lawnge. Skeet, skeet, skeet!

Mr Lawnge’s Top 5 Reasons to Stay Single

1. Your money is YOUR money.

2. Never battle with someone trying "change" you.

3. What happens in Vegas, doesn't have to stay in Vegas.

4. You don't have to give up your other friends.

5. Never dealing with "we need to talk".

Word - thanks for the insight Mr. Lawnge. And yes, I’m still jealous of the fact that you’ve got tickets to the Stones. I guess I’ll just have to settle with seeing McCartney tonight.

Have a great weekend everybody.

Entry #171
Thursday, September 22, 2005

Ok - first off, someone needs to tap Jamie Fox on the shoulder and let him know he’s not Ray Charles. Don’t get me wrong - he was amazing in the film "Ray" but once you start impersonating The Genuis on stage and singing like him on rap records, well, then you’re just losing your grip on reality, bro. R.I.P. Ray Charles.

Do you remember that giant pink bunny that you won as a child one hot summer night at the local fairgrounds? And you threw it away as you got older right?Well, I think I’ve found it.

And finally, if you’re in DE this weekend, The Wilmington Skate Project is hosting a skatejam in the Blue Rocks Parking Lot on Saturday to benefit the construction of a free local skatepark. There’ll be live music, food and a competition sponsored by Kinetic. So stop by, bring your board and show some support!

And speaking of skateboarding, I just saw Baker 3 and it’s pretty sick.

Entry #170
Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Someone actually handed me this flyer last night in Suburban Station. The full moon brings ‘em out every time.

And speaking of freaks coming out at night, what ever happened to these guys? Friends - how many of us really do have them?

I just found out that K-Os is playing a free show this Saturday on the Ben Franklin Parkway in Philly. For those unfamiliar, his sound is like a musical grab bag of hip hop and soul mixed with reggae inspired lyrics and a hint of 80’s college radio thrown in for good measure. The guy’s the real deal and, in my opinion, both his albums are highly under-rated classics.


Entry #169
Tuesday, September 20, 2005

I got to peep an advance copy of the new Franz Ferdinand album and once again the boys deliver. It might even be better than their debut. I also caught their recent “Making the Video” special and noticed a nice neon sculpture by graf artist KAWS in the background, which was pretty cool.

Did I mention that I’m going to see Paul McCartney on Friday?

Entry #168
Monday, September 19, 2005

Smashing Orange meets Crushing Castro at DAP3. We're label mates you know. Thanks to Ms. Bullette for the photo.

And speaking of DAP3, Bullette and Endless Mike Jambox both threw down strong sets and I had a great time just hanging out and catching up with the DE contingent which I don’t get to see as much as I’d like. Special thanks to Tim Coslar for setting the whole show up and putting his time and money on the line once again for the benefit of the normally ungrateful local music scene.  Word on the street is that The Invasion have decided to call it quits after 5 years of solid music, which is a shame.  Thanks for all your help over the years and for being such great practice space roommates. Best of luck to all involved - I wish you nothing but happiness. You will be missed.

Anyway, people are always asking me “Yo, what the hell was Tucker thinking?”  Well, my brother and sisters, it’s about time we cut out the middle man and send you directly to the source.  That’s right - Mr. Meme just threw his kangol into the blog ring.

Entry #167
Friday, September 16, 2005

"I don't sleep because sleep is the cousin of death..."

Did I mention that Nas and The Sitch have the same lawyer? Anyway, I've been up now for 32 straight hours - most of it starring at some glowing monitor like yourself right now.  Thankfully, Create-A-Thon 2005 is just about over. So, on that note...

This week's Top Five comes from multi-talented musician and all around good guy, the First State's own, Jefferson Cundiff.  Get'er done, Jeff!

Jefferson Cundiff's Top Five Absolute Worst Things About Working in a Music Store.

1. You love music, but you can't ever listen to it at work because you've got at least 3 people jamming on guitars at all times.

2. That guy who wants to try an acoustic guitar and then sings Stone Temple Pilots loudly (Creed style). Come on!! That's just awkward.

3. That guy that comes in and says, "Wow must be nice to work here.. I'd love to sit around and play guitar all day."

4. People who ask for a bagpipe demo and then write a mean letter to your boss because you didn't play the bagpipe for them. And... that letter gets posted on the bulletin board.. and everyone is talking about it.. I don't play the bagpipe ok. So fire me!

5. Being called the music store guy.

Thanks Jefferson - I feel your pain.  And be sure to check out some of my man's music on his myspace page.  After all, it don't cost a thing, bro.

With that, I'm outta here and off to dreamland.  Have a great weekend everybody. Hopefully I'll see you at DAP3 this Saturday night!


Entry #166
Thursday, September 15, 2005

Well, the coffee's brewing, the Mountain Dew is on ice and the candy's in the dish son! Create-A-Thon 2005 is here! I've marked my territory at Hypno Desgn and set up camp where for the next 24 plus hours I'll design until my fingers bleed. Thanks to everyone who pledged money for each hour worked - I truely appreciate your generocity and I know that the victims of Hurricane Katrina will as well. Damn - it's like a virtual tent city here with all these MAC's piled on top of each other. Anyway, I've gotta run - there's work to be done.


Entry #165
Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Sorry, no time to chat today - I've got a Create-A-Thon to prepair for. You're on your own for amusment today, bro.

Entry #164
Tuesday, September 13, 2005

The prolific Bullette dropped yet another new song on her website today. Download it here before she wakes up and realizes her prices are insane. And don’t forget to catch her this Saturday night at DAP3 in scenic downtown Wilmington, Delaware.

Anyway, Christmas will be here before you know it, so you may want to add this to your wish list. I know I am.

And in Sitch news, the hunt continues for a bass player so if you know of any, send them our way. Other than that, word on the street is that Mr. Tucker has begun posting his own inner most thoughts on a new blog somewhere in cyberspace and that JP is still Sleepless in Seattle. As for the Shark, well, let’s just assume that he’s still keeping it real.


Entry #163
Monday, September 12, 2005

On the way to work this morning, I saw a homeless man laying in an alley on some dirty milk crates reading a flyer someone gave him asking for donations of food and money to help people who lost their homes to hurricane Katrina. I just thought “That’s gotta sting." With so much drama going on so far away, sometime the people closest to you get forgotten.

Anyway, on a brighter note, here’s some footage of skateboard legend Mark Gonzales training for the Olympic long jump. Apparently, it’s from a new film about him called “Dizzy.” which will be available on DVD sometime soon. More info as it comes.

Dig it - this Saturday night the third installment of the Delaware Alternative Pop festival returns to Wilmington, DE. Fighting the good fight to bring original music back to the people of the First State,this year’s lineup features The Invasion (playing what will most likely be their last show), Bullette, The Endless Mike Jambox and The Cocks. The show starts at 9:00 PM at the Delaware Association of Police Hall at 2201 Lancaster Avenue. So, come down to the home of tax free shopping and support the DIY scene, and while you’re at it, you can buy me a drink while we shoot the breeze.

Entry #162
Friday, September 9, 2005

Even after numerous benefits, countless fundraisers and many political and celebrity pleas, BRC has still decided not to renew CBCG’s lease. However, in true punk fashion, the club’s owner, Hilli Crystal, has decided to TCB by taking it from the streets of NYC to the big apple’s halls of justice. DILLIGAF? Yes, I do. So please take a moment to sign this petition to help save a true musical landmark. The Ramones got their start there, as did Blondie, The Talking Heads and The Strokes - need I say more?

Anyway, here’s another blast from the past for all you children of the 80’s.

And, in case you haven’t heard, Monday’s the new Friday, which means no Top Five today. Yeah, Castro dropped the ball once again. I can almost hear the collective sigh of “Bummer, dude” while I type these words which, I'm sure you all know, breaks my fragile heart. But I’ve been promised one for Monday though, so keep your fingers crossed and stay tuned.

Have a great weekend everybody.


Entry #161
Thursday, September 8, 2005

Well, it looks like once again Mr Cheney is hooking up his boys at Halliburton with more of the taxpayer's money. Besides the reconstruction of Iraq, they’ve also been awarded some major government contracts for the rebuilding of the Big Easy. No surprise there, though, since Dick was the head of that operation until leaving to become VP. Honestly, I find all this backscratching pretty sickening. Is it 2008 yet?

Entry #160
Wednesday, September 7, 2005

Since a gallon of gas now costs as much as the latest issue of Rolling Stone, I’ve decided it’s about time to hang up the keys, dust off the two wheeler and hit the neighborhood old school style. So, we spent a good part of evening biking to the video store, bombing hills and weaving in and out of oncoming traffic through the local ACME parking lot (much like I did when I was 12). I definitely have to get a cushion or something for that seat though. I woke up this morning feeling like I spent the night in prison.

And, in case you’re wondering, we rented Crash last night, which was really well done but definitely not the feel good hit of the summer. Pretty true to life though.

Nick P. just sent this this clip from the air guitar finals! Apparently, my stage presence needs some work, bro.

Entry #159
Tuesday, September 6, 2005

Dig it - there’s nothing better than when your boss comes back from a week off and gives you this. Well, actually, I guess a raise would’nt hurt either, but whatever. That’s still one kick ass candle.

As many of you may have heard, The Situation is looking for a new bass player. So, if you or someone you know can play the bottom end like The Smith’s Andy Rourke, Mani from the Stone Roses or that dude from The Who, then definitely drop us a line as soon as possible. We’ve got an album that need’s promoting, bro.


Entry #158
Monday, September 5, 2005

Well, it's Labor Day and guess who's stuck working? It's not so bad though, since things are pretty slow. Back when Yomí worked here, we used to host "Holiday Movie Lunches" where he would download a bootleg of whatever comedy was out at the time (which, for some reason, was always subtitled in arabic or something), we'd hook up the video projection unit in the shop, grab some popcorn, hit the lights and enjoy! Actually, maybe that's why he no longer works here! Ahhh, the good old days.

Anyway, I did get a chance to pick up the latest issue of Juxtapose magazine over the weekend which has a nice article on Barry McGee's exhibit at Dietch in nyc. It's their special street art issue, which features interviews with various taggers, bombers and wheat pasters. Definitely worth checking out.

Entry #157
Friday, September 2, 2005

Ok, I’m not much of an sports fan and, honestly, I never really got into the whole NASCAR scene or anything, but I have to admit that this race did peak my interest. Actually, I can’t believe Nick P.’s not coming back for this. Finally, a race he could get behind.

Anyway, it’s Friday, which means I can finally shut my virtual pie-hole for a moment and let someone else speak their peace. That said, this week’s Might Top Five comes from “Law and Order” groupie and lover of all things British, the First State’s own, Christina. Take it away, girl!

Christina’s Top Five Concerts (thus far)

1. Morrissey, 10/10/04 - Radio City Music Hall, NYC.
The brilliant MORRISSEY lights, the front row ticket, the beautiful, debonair Mozzer only inches from my grasp...he came over and shook my hand! Our physical contact had me swooning for days afterward.

2. The Cure, 10/31/97 - Irving Plaza, NYC.
I had camped out the week before on the streets of New York to score tickets but they sold out before I had a fighting chance. I got into the show by sheer luck...Robert and Co. were fantastic in this small venue and I got to hear Lovesong live for the first time.

3. Coldplay, September 2002, Baltimore. Another intimate setting, right before these guys became the megaband they are today. Such energy. Chris singing Nelly's 'Hot In Herre' was a bonus.

4. Bauhaus, 9/11/98 - Hammerstein Ballroom, NYC.
The Resurrection Tour brought the undead and their minions out in droves. The feeling of anticipation in the audience was palpable, like children itching to open their first Christmas gift. Bauhaus was positively mesmerizing- in their stark, gothy way.

5. Motley Crue, August 1987 - Spectrum, Philly.
Ok, I had to add this because it was my first concert ever at age 10! They were my favorite band, and I was totally rockin' out. Plus, Tommy had that awesome spinning drumset-in-a-cage thing going on. Yeah, I know you're jealous.

Thanks, Christina. And thanks for being honest and representing New Castle with the Motley Crüe memory. Shout at the devil, dude! But hey, I can’t talk - I saw G-N-R with Metallica back in ‘91 at the Meadowlands!

So, that’s it for me. Have a great weekend, everybody.


Entry #156
Thursday, September 1, 2005

First off - a message to the citizens of the world in these troubled times.

On a lighter note, while vacationing at the beach last week, we wet to this crazy ice cream shop that had flavors such as “bacon”, “viagra” and “cappuccino stout beer” Personally, I played it safe and stuck with Mint Chocolate Chip. Anyway, if this sounds like your thing, then be sure to visit Udder Delight in Rehoboth Beach, DE. They also sell erotic hot sauces or something although I didn’t sample those either.

Quote of the Day:
"Dude, if I came home from work everyday smelling like ice cream, I would have so much sex."
- Nick P. on the benefits of getting a job at Maggie Moo's


Entry #155
Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Ok, Ok, - I’m not going to say I recommend The Brown Bunny, because, honestly, I think 99% of you will probably hate it and I wouldn’t want you to waste your hard earned bread on something you might not like. However, I have to admit that I thought it was pretty good. Obviously, it’s no Buffalo 66 and, yes, I could have done without the gratuitous B.J. scene toward the films end, but, all in all, it was well shot and nicely put together. I’ve always loved the cinematography in Vincent Gallo’s films and this one doesn’t disappoint - as long as you don’t mind ten minute long shots of him driving down some highway that were filmed through a dead bug covered windshield. The last two minutes, though, are the best part of the film, when everything gets explained.

Anyway, I spent a good portion of last night watching people loot stores in New Orleans on CNN which, I have to say, was sad and made me a little ashamed to be an american - especially after last year’s tsunami, where looting was minimal and everyone helped each other out. Then again, what do you expect when every other song on the radio is about how much bling I flash while MTV keeps showing reruns of spoiled richie kids on My Super Sweet Sixteen? Yes, it’s hard not to be a little greedy these days with all this wealth being shoved in your face. Regardless, it’s time to help out. You can make your donations to the Red Cross here.

And, for you all you Smiths fans out there, maybe this will help your dreams come true.


Entry #154
Tuesday, August 30, 2005

There’s nothing like coming back from a nice week off to be greeted by a mountain of work calling your name. No sunshine for me today.

Anyway, I’m pleased to announce that yours truly, Joe Castro, as been asked to participate in this year’s Create-A-Thon, an annual event where Philadelphia area graphic designers donate one 24 hour day of their time to create marketing materials for deserving non-profit institutions. And, in case you’re wondering, I’ve already got the coffee brewing and the soy milk on ice, bro. It all happens on September 15th.


Entry #153
Monday, August 29, 2005

Well, I’d be lying if I said that it’s good to be back. Vacation was wonderful. Let’s just leave it at that.

Thanks again to everyone who filled in here for the past week - Tim, Bullette, Holly, Gnomadic and Nick P. You’re all very hard acts to follow and I really enjoyed reading each of your posts, no matter how painful they may have been (Tim!). Actually, I’m starting to think that I should take vacations more often and leave this site to the professionals.

Anyway, we got to attend the opening of Rehoboth Beach’s new pop art gallery, Pop Rocks, which featured some really cool photographs taken by Andy Warhol at his summer home on Long Island as well as works by Stango. Did I mention that they also had free champagne and mango spring rolls? Afterwards, I dropped some loot at the local toy store on the re-issued version of Wacky Packages. Yes, I refuse to grow up.

Mr. Tucker just sent this over from Philebrity - Shai from the Capitol Years took on the task of writing a song whose lyrics included as many Philly band names as he could come up with. I think he did a pretty good job - listen for yourself here.


Entry #152
Friday, August 26, 2005
Today's Guest Columnist:
Nick P.
Well first of all let me say that the guest columnists this week have been nothing short of stellar. I actually got a telegram from Mighty Joe himself and he has been very impressed as well. Good job gals and Tim.

Also I would like to borrow Joe's soapbox for a minute. Many years ago a friend of mine joined the reserves to get some money. Due to his stress, anxiety, and several other mental disorders he was put into the inactive reserves and all but kicked out. Now that the numbers are running low that are trying to make him active despite medical disqualification. He has one repeal left and then who knows. So I am asking all of you out there to sign this petition. It may be his and many other soldiers last hope.

Today is friday so here is
Top 5 Things I'm going to miss about Philly
5. Sitch Shows: If you can't be in a band, be a roadie for one. That's what Cameron Crowe's mom used to say.

4. The Skate Scene: Being a short subway ride from FDR and a quick drive for the X-Games Park and a few free outdoor parks has completely spoiled me. Actually maybe it was the Title 10 bowl that spoiled me. Thank God it closed or I might be snotty about where I like to skate.

3. My Apartment: I am convinced my former apartment is that last affordable and nice apartment in Center City. It has not only been my apartment but my home.

2. The Ghost tours of Philadelphia: Working for the Ghost Tour has been a great experience. I never thought I would become so close to a woman in her 50's but Eileen is as close to me as any of my other friends.

1. My Friends: Sure I'm only a few hours away but it still hurts not to be able to see your friends on a daily basis.

Good luck exploring the infinite abyss.
Nick

Entry #151
Thursday, August 25, 2005
Today's Guest Columnist:
Dj. Gnomadic
If there's one thing I've learned about Joe Castro in the four years that I've known him, it's that he is one of the truly great instigators of the 21st century. If there's a stupid prank you've always wanted pull, but haven't had the wherewithal to actually perform, tell Joe. He will be sure to egg you on. While Joe vacations, you may consider these alternatives.

The first is from Shakespeare's great tragedy Macbeth, although I'm sure you can relate to the potent power of the sweet nectar of the gods:

MACDUFF. Was it so late, friend, before you went to bed, That you overslept?

PORTER. Faith, sir, we were carousing until about three o'clock. And drink, sir, is a great instigator of three things.

MACDUFF. What three things does drink especially instigate?

PORTER. By Mary, sir, nose-painting, sleep, and urine. Lust, sir, it instigates and un-instigates. It instigates the desire, only it takes away the performance. Therefore much drink may be said to be a liar to lechery. It makes him, and it mars him; it sets him on, and it takes him off; it persuades him, and disheartens him; makes him put up with pain, and not put up with pain. In conclusion, lies him into a sleep, and giving him the lie, leaves him.

Perhaps the conspicuous consumption has left you feeling a bit under the weather. It might be difficult to, say, shove a twizzler up your nose and have it come out your mouth, if you are doubled over in agony on the bathroom floor. Now it may be time to try to get all those toxins out of your system. Karuna Retreats will come to your rescue.

Colonics are a great instigator of emotional reflection upon the past, as the Colon's muscle structure is home to so many long-held tensions. Everything from potty-training to social fears can be held there, and with the massaging effects of the Colonics, and the detoxification of these muscles, more than just mucous is shed. Entire nerve systems can reflex out of a suffocating stricture that they have been locked into for years, and this WILL have an effect upon the being as a whole. Whilst on retreat, you have ensured yourself the space and time to travel through everything that comes up. The greatest motivating factor in any kind of detox is the faith that this venture is worthwhile. And there is no greater motivator than seeing the putrid material that has been held in pockets in the Colon for a lifetime. Slowly the distaste fades and a new relationship is born between the person and their bowel. This in turn goes along way to healing the different feelings of separation between mind and body.

Joe, we anxiously await your return with full bladders and clean colons. And when you get back, you'll tell us that all you need is a little Mountain Dew and chocolate. If only it were so simple.  Hurry home, great instigator!  These temporary measures cannot rival your power.

Entry #150
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Today's Guest Columnist:
Fabric Artist Holly
ok, so i'm not feeling so great today, and i'm making nick post this up here all late, and making him look bad, which is making me feel even crappier right now.  then joe's going to read this, and think i don't feel well because i was out partying and picking up boys last night.  (not to disappoint, but i had a very nice date on monday night, which did not include me falling down, or topless, polka-dotted lesbians running circles around a girl with a strap-on.  it was just a normal date, with dinner and drinks, and several games of donkey kong.  and then i took him home with me.) i was going to say all kinds of nice crap about joe: about what a great first boyfriend he was, about how i couldn't have asked for a kinder, more thoughtful and safer boyfriend at 15.  but fuck that.  driving 50 mph down satan's road, with the lights out, on our first date wasn't safe.  nor was throwing molotov cocktails at the unfinished 896 (i did not happily participate in this.  it was all james.  shocking that he's in the army now, no?).  playing metallica on his guitar every chance he got was neither thoughtful or kind.  it wasn't all bad though.  we did stay together for two years, and 15 years later, we're still very good friends. for a little more than half of the past 15 years, joe and i were out of touch.  when he first emailed me again after so long, and we agreed to meet, i was so incredibly nervous.  it was like blind date nervous.  i knew this guy, but so long ago that i didn't really know him at all.  what if he turned into a big jerk?  what if he thought i was a jerk?  and i was going to see the situation for the first time.  what if they sucked?  you can imagine my relief when i realized that he was the same wise-cracking, smart-assed, but deep, deep, deep down inside, very kind-hearted person that i'd known so long ago.  and the situation was awesome.  i expected scary metallica inspired rock, seeing as how that's all i ever heard him play in high school. i really wanted to post a picture of us from his senior prom, but we both look ridiculous.  and he might quite literally kill me.

Entry #149
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Today's Guest Columnist:
Songstress Bullette

Who can top Tim's Zip story? Well, a thousand words are implied by this photo of NERO performing (in 1995/1996??) at the East End, Newark, Delaware. Note Mighty Joe's swoop sideburns/floral shirt/def jam tshirt; Jeremy's Big Dooky sticker and concentration(?); LAZ's lovely locks and Godflesh tshirt; and my third arm. rock on, Monika Bullette

Entry #148
Monday, August 22, 2005
Today's Guest Columnist:The Invasion's frontman Tim Coslar

"Zip File"

This is a true story.  July 2, 2005.  The train station in Morton was busy all day shipping folks into Philly for Live 8.  We stayed in town, walked the one block to the swim club.  I had on my favorite pair of faded dark blue swim shorts.  Got back, refreshed, went upstairs, used the bathroom and casual conversion with my girlfriend let concentration slip.  I pulled my zipper up, much too quick.  YAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!  Only one out of six senses was burning through my whole body, but her voice got through.  "Are you all right?"  "I'm fine!"  "Something About Mary".  I never liked Ben Stiller, but now I was a bigger joke than he ever was to me.  In 33 years this had never happened to me before.  Take a deep breath, and pull.  YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!  Look @ your thumb, and that's about how much flesh from the long part was caught in the zipper head, like the meat from an Arby's Super Roast Beef bulging out of the bun.  "Babe, are you all right?", I heard again.  "I'm OK.  I had a little accident."  I walked out of the bedroom towards her, not being able to stay still, anyway.  She didn't realize how much was caught.  "No way.  Can you pull it out?"  "I'm tryin'!"  I went back into the bedroom, pain and fear and anger were swelling up, like… Lucas, her 5 year old son, rushed into the bedroom doorway, his platinum blonde hair wild. "Tim, aw you awwight?".  I turned away and stuck out my hand.  "I'm OK, bud." "Did you get your penith thtuck in your thipper?"  His mom to the rescue.  "Honey, why don't you go back out and play?"  "Awwight".  Luc dashed outside where 12 other little kids were waiting.  "Guyth!  Gueth what?  Tim got hith penith thtuck inith thipper!"  Great.  The pain was so much now that I wanted to explode.  Beth came in to take the matter into her own hands.  "Do you want me to do it?  Oh, my God.  I had no idea.  You need to go to the emergency room."
Standing up was OK.  Changing positions to sit, moving at all was painful.  I needed cash for the co-pay.  I snuck out to the car, all 12 kids distracted in the back yard and unaware I was leaving.  I couldn't close my shorts, so my shirt was hanging over for cover, and I limped with one hand out in front, holding my wallet.  Off to Wawa and its MAC machine.  Drove to Taylor Hospital.  Filling out the "reason for visit" card.  Waiting to be seen, while Pink Floyd are on TV, from London for Live 8, performing "Comfortably Numb".  Saw the tree-osh nurse.  "I never saw anything like this before."  She took my blood pressure, heart rate.  "I was thinking you guys could just give me a local and cut this thing off.  The zipper, I mean."  She was done.  "Oh, no,. You don't have to go back out and wait, the doctor will see you right away".  The doctor, he could sympathize.  "Don't you look when you zip?  I'll be right back".  Guy was the best. Assured me I'd be fully functional after it was all over, which was my biggest concern.  He raided the hospital maintenance shop for pliers and tin snips.  Decided to tap a vein and put me to sleep.   I told the male nurse, out of embarrassment for what I'd done, "Please, no chicks in here while I'm under, you know?"  Left me alone in the room watching Robert Duvall in "Lonesome Dove".  Started to feel funky, from the drip.  Cracked some jokes about them recognizing me out somewhere after all this was over.  Then I wasn't feeling so tired; got worried the stuff wasn't working.  Doc walked by, "How you feelin'?  Wakin' up?"  "Yeah, I'm not sleepy at all.  Is this working?"  "You're done.  Look under the sheet".  YES!  All wrapped up like a gauze Twinkie.  Waitaminit- "Lonesome Dove was still on TV.  Yeah, 'cause it's a 6-hour show, zipper head.  The clock read almost 8 PM.  I'd lost over an hour.  Drugs.  Shorts were trashed; zipper obliterated- couldn't even keep it as a souvenir.  Nurse said, "We can't let you drive home.  It takes 8 hours to wear off.  Can you call someone?"  Joe Castro.  He'll be thrilled.  Heard his machine, remembered he was in NYC.  "Hey, Joe, Tim.  By the time you hear this, well, never mind.  Hope you had a great time in New York.  See ya."  Sympathetic doc returned, "Wait an hour, then you can leave".  As I do, nurses outside on their smoke break wave, telling me they heard I was gonna be OK.  Thanks, Ladies.  Let's keep it to ourselves, shall we?
Back home, wearing ER scrubs.  Lucas and his sister Morgan were full of questions.  "Was it because you got your you-know-what caught?, she asked"  And Lucas, "Tim, where are your shortth?  Did the hothpital get your penith out?"  "They sure did, dude".  Let this be a lesson to all.  In this ever accelerating world, take the time to do what needs to be done, safely.  Thank you. 

Entry #147
Friday, August 19, 2005
Well, they said it would never happen again, but guess what? The ban has been temporarily lifted and, for the sake of a great cause, the creation of a free skatepark in Wilmington, The Situation will once again be sharing the stage with The Invasion! If that’s not reason enough to make it out tonight, then I don’t know what is. So head on down to the 4W5 Cafe in Wilmington, DE to find out how cold hell has actually gotten.

Anyway, it’s Friday which means it’s time for the Mighty Top Five. This one comes from my favorite First Degree Blackbelt and without a doubt one of the smartest and most caring people I know, Miss Jen A. Take it away, Jen.

Jen’s Top Five Free Things to do at the Beach

1. Gather your friends and enter a local sand sculpting contest!  Consisting of only sand and water, these sculptures are true and transient art!  There are contests all over the Jersey and Delaware beaches throughout the summer.  For inspiration check out the World Championships in Canada! www.harrisand.org  Believe it or not, there is even a section in the Guiness Book of World Records for Sand Sculptors.
    
2. Forgo the lights, noise, and crowds of the boardwalk for a night, put on your favorite old sweatshirt and jeans, wait ‘till the about seven o’clock at night and bring a couple of cans of A&P root beer, some sandwiches and some oreo cookies down to the beach for a picnic and some kite flying!

3. If it Rains:  Play board games and eat caramel popcorn.  Or even better, break out that dusty eight track player and get funky with Lawrence Welk type tunes and fall asleep to recordings of old Orsen Wells Radio Shows.

4. If you’re on the Atlantic coast, Take a road trip to Assateague Island and Chincoteague island to observe hundreds of wild horses. There are hiking trails, campsites, and miles of beach to explore.  No trip is complete without tons of bug spray and your weathered copy of Misty of Chincoteague, by Marguerite Henry.
      
5. Collect some shells, beach grass, polished rocks, and crab carcasses and get to work with some Elmer’s glue- consider creating some of those weirdly cute animals made out of shells that you see at the “Sea Shell Shop” or corner the market on Oyster shell “Hotwheels”.

Thanks, Jen. Although you forgot “streaking.” That’s another free and fun thing to do at the beach - right, jp?

Well, that’s it for me - I’m off for vacation. Have a great weekend everybody. And be sure to enjoy all of our guest columnist here everyday next week!

Oh yeah, and a big Congratulations to Ry-Ry and his girlfriend Jasna on the birth of their brand new bad baby boy, Blake! How's that for alliteration, Tucker?

Entry #146
Thursday, August 18, 2005
What - you think you’re getting an update from me when I’m 48 hours away from vacation? No way, bro. And, no, I’m not travelling anywhere special like Spain or China - I’m staying home and relaxing, just like in The Burb’s To be honest, I love that movie.

Speaking of movies, has anyone seen The Brown Bunny yet? I think I may rent it next week along with Prozac Nation.

Is it Friday yet?


Entry #145
Wednesday, August 17, 2005
What do you get when you combine 4 boxes of no-frills crispy rice, 8 bags of marshmallows and a pound of butter? One big ass rice crispy treat, courtesy of Chef Nick. P.

Speaking of big, if you’re bored and looking for a way to enjoy yourself and you happen to have about 600 balloons lying around, look no further. Balloon Bowl! is the way to go, bro!

Our friends in The Northern Hues recently posted a few new live tracks on their myspace site. Take a listen here and let the boys know what you think.

Entry #144
Tuesday, August 16, 2005
Dig it - I’m taking a vacation. That’s right, boys and girls, Mr. Castro is forgoing any cyberspace travel for one week starting next Monday. However, as you know, it’s not my style to leave you hanging. So, I’m looking for a few good men and women, five to be exact, to be special guest columnist all next week. Got something you want to get off your chest? Well, brothers and sisters, it’s time to testify. If you’re up to the challenge, then shoot me an email to take over this virtual soapbox for a day.

As promised, here are a few photos from my recent stay on a Russian submarine, which, I might add, was docked in the dangerous waters off the coast of the mighty state of Rhode Island. I know, it’s kind of like calling a janitor a custodial engineer, isn’t it?

And just for good measure, here’s a photo of Brian McTear mixing The Situation’s record. Good things come to those who wait, bro.

Entry #143
Monday, August 15, 2005
My favorite person recently gave me my new favorite coffee mug! Starbuck’s never tasted better, bro.

So, we spent yesterday exploring Baltimore and visiting the American Visionary Art Museum, which, if you’ve never been, is a really cool (although small) museum featuring art by self taught and/or institutionalized artists. The best part has to be their insane gift shop, where I got not only the aforementioned mug, but also a pack of Monkey Nuggets and a great book on the art of Ray Johnson. If you’re unfamiliar with his work, check out the film How To Draw a Bunny. He was quite a character.

Speaking of B-more, have you ever had a “Burger Cookie?” They’re no joke, son! It’s a small tea biscuit smothered in chocolate cake frosting! Apparently, they’re a local delicacy but I may be importing them up to north very shortly.

Entry #142
Friday, August 12, 2005
No Top Five today, only a moment of silence...

Gabino Castro (1910 - 2005)

As many of you know, my grandfather passed away this past Monday at the age of 94. He was a man respected by all who met him, not because of any great deeds (although there were many - a veteran of World War II, he was involved in the invasion of Normandy (D-Day) where he was wounded and earned the purple heart), but because of the way he carried himself and the way he treated other people. He was a class act, in every sense of the word, always willing to help someone out when they needed it regardless of any inconvenience it may have caused himself. He was without a doubt the most amazing man I have ever had the privilege of knowing. Unfortunately, words can't do justice here and, if you never met him, you wouldn't understand. I miss him very much. Rest in Peace.

Have a great weekend, everybody. And spend some time with your loved ones.

Entry #141
Thursday, August 11, 2005
After one final 13 hour session, The Sitch’s debut album is at last mixed and ready to be mastered. We’re actually on schedule which, if you’re at all familiar with this group of individuals, is pretty amazing. I even saw the Shark smile at some point.

As promised, here are the details about the Wilmington Skatepark Benefit we’ll be playing Friday August 19th. The show will take place at the 4W5 Cafe in scenic downtown Wilmington, Delaware (A Place To Be Somebody, bro!) with a $5 cover charge and an 8:00 pm start time. Also playing are Count Von Count and B’Gosh. For someone who grew up skating in DE in the late ‘80’s, the promise of a free skate facility is a dream come true. Please come out and support grassroots skateboarding.

If all goes well, I should have some photos from my five day trip through Providence, RI as well as some pics from the studio posted within the next couple of days. In the meantime, feel free to amuse yourself with this animation I recently did for Please Touch Museum’s website.


Entry #140
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Thanks to everyone who came out to the show last night. You made the evening so enjoyable, which definitely helped pick up my spirit. Word on the street is that Laz will be back for at least one more show - this one on August 19th in Wilmington at a benefit to raise money for the construction of a community skatepark. More info to come tomorrow.

Anyway, Tucker and I are at the studio with Brian McTear, working on the mixes for The Sitch's debut album. Keep your finger's crossed, bro.

Speaking of Mr. Tucker, he recently was interviewed by Philly's own Joey Sweeney for his Philebrity website. Click here to find out what's been on my man's mind.

Entry #139
Monday, August 8, 2005
Well folks, Castro couldn't make it in today. Hopefully he'll be back tomorrow. I'm not going to venture as to what he would write about today but I do know that he waned to post a video clip from Nick P's Farewell Philly Karaoke Tour. The tour kicked off last night at the locust bar and this click of Nick singing the new Billy Idol single was obtain by a MJC.com spy.

Enjoy.

Entry #138
Friday, August 5, 2005
Ok, I know you’re wondering “What’s up Castro, where’s the Top Five this week? Don’t tell me your slacker ass forgot to take care of business again?” Well, never you worry brother and sisters, Castro’s coming through for you with not five, not six, but seven! So here it is folks, the dates for:
Nick’s P’s Seven Days of Karoake tour!

Sun, Aug. 7th
Locust Bar 8:00 p.m. - 10th and Locust

Mon, Aug. 8th
Millcreek Tavern 10:00 p.m. - 42nd and Chester

Tue, Aug. 9th
Finn McCool's 10:00 p.m.(after the Sitch's show at the kyhber) - 118 S 12th Street

Wed, Aug. 10th
McGillin's Old Ale House 8:00 p.m. - 1310 Drury St

Thu, Aug. 11th
Virgo's 9:00 p.m. - Somewhere in Ridley Park (ask Castro)

Fri, Aug. 12th
Downey's 9:00 p.m. - 526 S. Front Street

Sat, Aug. 13th
Caritas 9:00 p.m. - (invitation only)

Thanks Nick. Ok, I know that wasn’t exactly a Top Five (or seven) but, if all goes well, we’ll have daily film clips of Nick bringing down the house with such classics as “Momma Said Knock You Out” and Journey’s “Separate Ways.” Besides, I’m in Providence at RISD, about to head over to the Russian Submarine that will be our home for the evening so, you know, cut me some slack.

Entry #137
Thursday, August 4, 2005
Instead of checking back here all the time trying to figure out what I’m doing, maybe you should figure out what you’re doing, man.

Mr. Tucker has been hard at work finishing vocal takes and re-writing lyrics in a last minute rush to prepare the Sitch’s album for our three day marathon mixing session at Miner Street Studios with Brian Mctear. No word on a definite release date yet. As usual, more to come as the days pass.

Entry #136
Wednesday, August 3, 2005
Well, I’m about to get into a van with a bunch of inner-city teenagers for a six hour drive to Plimoth Plantation. Luckily, I’m bringing my iPod to help drown out the hours of bad R&B that will no doubt be blaring from the van’s speakers. Stories and photos to come soon.

If you’re in the Philly area this Saturday night and feel like getting the shit scarred out of you, head on over to the International House where Exhumed Films will be presenting “From beyond the Grave”, featuring not one, not two but three movies filled to the brim with zombies, ghouls and most likely screaming women.

Entry #135
Tuesday, August 2, 2005
Damn, I just stuffed my face with two incredibly delicious dark chocolate covered pretzels with mint icing. That’s right - you know how we roll. It’s ok, though - I went swimming this morning so, you know, I’m still stuff buff or whatever. Besides, tomorrow night I’ll be sleeping under the stars at Plimoth Plantation, living like they did in the 1600’s and, as far as I know, those Pilgrims aren’t exactly known for their vegetarian food fare.

Anyway, I’ve been listening to nothing but the first two albums by The Cramps recently. Both are classics. Any band that can take Link Wray’s “Rumble” and turn it into an ode to “I Was A Teenage Werewolf” are alright in my book.

Entry #134
Monday, August 1, 2005
After spending an intense 12 straight hours in the studio Saturday, it looks like the guitars for The Sitch's new record are just about finished. All that's left is the main riff for "Pillbox Locket" which I'll be re-recording tomorrow night for the 127th time this year because the sound STILL isn't right. And, honestly, I don't know how Jim Salamone does it - the guy's a non-stop working machine. I'm pretty sure after Tucker and I stumbled out of that place he was still up for a few hours slaving away.

We saw Wedding Crashers over the weekend and, I gotta testify - Vince Vaughan and Owen Wilson come through big time once again. Very funny and a little bit over the top, just how I like it.

Anyway, the next 10 days are shaping up to be pretty intense and a little crazy. Did I mention that I'm spending Friday night on a Russian Submarine?

Entry #133
Friday, July 29, 2005
If you haven’t seen the new DC Shoes commercials featuring Inside the Actors Studio’s main man James Lipton, you must check them out because they’re all pretty funny.  I especially enjoyed watching Travis Pastrana backflip into the Grand Canyon on a motorcycle with a parachute strapped to his back.  Sick.

Last night’s bass guitar session went off without a hook - could the curse of The Sitch finally be broken?  Or is it just because Laz’s leaving and he’s no longer affected? We’ll have to wait and see how things go during this weekend’s guitar sessions.  Of course, having a guy behind the mixing board who previously worked on Kriss Kross’ platinum debut doesn’t hurt either. The Daddy Mack’ll make ya Jump, Jump....

Anyway, in honor of last night’s wheat paste expedition, this Friday’s Mighty Top Five comes from the instigator of grain glue himself, Mr. Mischief Night.  Take it away, homeboy.

Mr. Mischief Night’s Top Five Late Night Wheat Pasting Moments.

1. Sitting in a car stopped on 15th Street while two strangers, screaming at each other from opposite sides of the vehicle, pull pistols out on each other, old west meets south philly style

2. Watching a drunken woman hike her skirt up so she could “mark her territory” on Walnut Street.

3. Watching a mustached leather clad transvestite try to pick up Wheat Germ for a late night rendezvous.

4. Drunk people really like to make out in the middle of the street around 3:00 AM - it’s sort of like an urban nature program. Enough said.

5. Talking to a homeless man while he shaves his crotch with a disposable razor to help stop his flea problem.  Then watching him chuck said razor into Wheat Germ’s bucket of paste while the Germ is inside Little Pete’s ordering a milkshake.  Even better is the look on his face when he finally discovered what’s floating in the bucket - priceless!

Thanks, Mr. Mischief Night. Keep the paste flowing!

That’s it for me. Have a great weekend everybody.!

Entry #132
Thursday, July 28, 2005
Update? We don' need no stinking update!

I'm working from home today, listening to Mos Def while sipping on a slurpee. Aren't you jealous?

Entry #131
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
Why is it when people wish you good luck, they say “I’ll keep my fingers crossed” but, when they lie to you, they also keep their fingers crossed? I don’t know - it makes no sense to me, bro.

Dig it, The Situation is returning to The Khyber for what may very well be Laz’s farewell show. The gig is on Tuesday August 9th and we’ll be opening for The Shout Out Louds and The Redwalls, both who have been creating quite a buzz on the national music scene. This show will most likely sell out so, if you’re planning on going, either get your tickets in advance or show up early.

Entry #130
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
Not only is it hot as h-e-double hockey sticks, but someone’s been blarring “Mexican Radio” in the office today. I’m beginning to think the rising temperatures starting to drive everyone a little looney.

Anyway, with TV being so bad lately (except for Hogan Knows Best - come on, you’ve got to show the Hulkster some love, bro) I’ve been listening to old episodes of I Was A Communist For The FBI! You’ve gotta love McCarthy-era entertainment, especially in today’s post 9/11 high paranoia society. The more things change, the more they stay the same.


Entry #129
Monday, July 25, 2005
Not only is Laz the king of grilling his own style of homemade seitan, but his wife also happens to bake the best banana chocolate cupcakes on the planet. Oh yeah, I ate well this weekend.

We also caught most of blues guitarist Buddy Guy’s set at Penn’s Landing on Friday night, which was good except for the fact that most of it consisted of ten minute solos by his sax and keyboard players. You can definitely hear his influence on Hendrix’s playing, though (and vice versa.) and, with song after song about “slipping in, slipping out,” he’s definitely following in ye olde “dirty old man” blues tradition.

Word on the street is that same night The Sitch’s own Mr. Tucker, after catching a late night performance by Shade at the Manhattan Room, took off on a whim to Chi-town to watch his boys in Brian Jonestown Massacre’s set at Lollapolooza. No word as of yet on how it went but he did leave a coherent message from O’Hara airport that said he was on his way home so, that’s a good thing.


Entry #128
Friday, July 22, 2005
What the hell is Kombucha? I don’t know but the Kombucha Wonder Drink I picked up from Whole Foods today tasted pretty good and, rumor has it, it’ll turn gray hair back to it’s normal color as well as ease carpel tunnel syndrome. Sorry, Tucker, Splenda’s got nothing on this stuff.

Ok, as most of you know, I’m always going off on here about the vegetarian lifestyle so, in all fairness, this weeks Top Five is dedicated to all you carnivors out there. Not only is it the most factual Top Five ever but it also comes from curator extraordianire and ultra-Elvis fan, Ms. Stacey. Take it away, sister:

Stacey’s Top Five Hot Dog Eating Stadiums for 2005

1. Dodger Stadium--1,674,400 (Los Angeles, CA)

2. Coors Field--1,545,000 (Denver, CO)

3. Wrigley Field--1,543,500 (Chicago, IL)

4. Yankees Stadium--1,365,000 (New York, NY)

5. Minute Maid Park--1,248,000 (Houston, TX)

(Citizens Bank Park in Philly comes in at No. 8 with 800,000 hot dogs!)

Thanks Stacey. Thank ya very much. And thanks for cool Bendo’s Monkey. I promise to give him a good home! Ever hear Monkey Man by The Rolling Stones? Let it Bleed is such as great record,

That’s it for me. Have a great weekend everybody!

Entry #128
Thursday, July 21, 2005
This is much better that anything Lucas has done lately.. And, besides, I love fruit.

Entry #127
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
This is the scene at the skatepark last night:

Girl (who works there, maybe 16 years old): Are you both 18?

Joe Castro: (pause) Uh, yeah.

Girl What are you, like 23?

Joe Castro: I’m 32

Kid Next to Me: Wow, you’re 32!?!

Joe Castro: Yeah, kid - my pads are older than you.

Girl Wow, are you married with kids and stuff?

Nick: No, we’re late bloomers.

Ok, that wasn’t so exciting...but when was the last time you got asked if you were over 18? Regardless, it was a good session even though we were both a bit rusty.

Speaking of exciting, I’ve been at CPR training all day today. There’s nothing quiet like swapping latex with a lifeless rubber body. And she wondered why I’m not married yet?

Anyway, Tucker and I are headed up to the studio to go through what’s been recorded and what needs to be done so that we can finally wrap up the Sitch record.

Entry #126
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
Crazy Chris Hillman, the king of robotics, keeps slipping me these vitamin gumballs that he’s really fond of and I have to admit that I’m starting to get hooked. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Good news for all you dirtbags out there - a recent study shows that daily showers may cause brain damage.

Speaking of brain damage, I’m going skateboarding tonight for the first time in months with Wheat Germ who, unfortuantely, forgot to pack his camera so we can’t document the carnage. Check back tomorrow to find out if my old body can still walk.